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Season 3
Ordinary Extraordinary Love
Ordinary Extraordinary Love
Season 3 | Episode 309 | Aired 01/08/2013

STORY 1: Alex Sells a Dress
When pop star Winnie McCray (guest star Laura Catalina Ortiz) buys a dress from Alex’s store for a special date, Penny’s plan to tip off the paparazzi to get publicity for the store backfires.

 

Memorable Quotes:

Alex: "I kind of feel bad about spilling the beans on Winnie's date."
Penny: "If she didn't want people to know she was here, why would she tell you?"
Alex: "I just have one of those faces that says, 'Where are you eating?' 'Cause my mouth is in my face and that's what my mouth is saying."

Penny: "Relax, this is my specialty, I can spin this, which is why everyone at work calls me 'The Old Spinster!'"

Alex: "I've got to hand it to you Penny, you were right."
Penny: "Well that's the reason everyone at work calls me 'undateable.' Because you can't put a date on the last time I was wrong about a PR-related issue."

Penny: "Winnie, I am really, genuinely sorry. I just saw a PR opportunity and I went full speed ahead like a runaway train, which is why everyone in my office calls me 'an absolute trainwreck!' Wait…I'm starting to question those loving nicknames."
Alex: "Finally."
____________________

STORY 2: Max's Identity Crisis
When Max realizes he doesn’t fit into any of the traditional gay categories, Jane and Derrick (guest star Stephen Guarino) take him on a tour of gay bars in Chicago to help him find out where he belongs.

 

Memorable Quotes:

Max: "Well, it's official: I am retiring from gay. That’s right, I'm straight now. From this moment forward it's going to be a steady diet of boobs and dudes—damn it! From this moment forward it will be a steady diet of chicks with—damn it!"

Derrick (explaining what a "twink" is): "It's one of our many gay categories. We have our bears, our queens, our daddies, our sugar caddies, our maple smoked sausage patties, our Belgian waffles, and of course our six-tops. Fun fact, those last four are just things that are in this room."

Derrick: "Are you ready to continue your quest, young grasshopper? Just to clarify, 'young grasshopper' isn't your gay category, because you don't have the legs and you old, bitch!"

Jane: "According to my math, you are 10 percent panther, 15 percent wolf, zero percent twink, and 40 percent body fat."
Max: "I guess no one will ever love me. Now I know how webisodes feel."
____________________

STORY 3: Brad and Dave Man It Up
Brad and Dave set out to prove their manhood by taking on a home improvement task and end up competing in their very own Man-Am games.

 

Memorable Quotes:

Dave: "I'm pretty handy. I Bob Vila-ed the squeak out of a cabinet last week."
Alex: "You used butter and then you tried to make croissants and didn't have enough butter and then screamed into a brown bag."
Dave: "I know what I screamed into."

Brad (On installing a dimmer on a light switch): "Bro, do you want to man it up and install this dim-dog ourselves?"
Dave: "Is Val Kilmer my spirit animal?"
Brad: "I don't know."
Dave: "You betcha. So yeah, I want to man it up!"

Featured Moments

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  • Brothas and Sisters
    21:37 | Aired on 05/03/2013
    Jane is tasked with planning the perfect wedding for her older sister, Brooke (Stephanie March); Dave and Alex hide a big secret.
  • The Storm Before the Calm
    21:29 | Aired on 04/12/2013
    Penny writes a play as a way to deal with her breakup with Pete and wants Derrick and his theater group to stage it; Alex and Max get an offer from a marketing group.
  • Deuce Babylove 2: Electric Babydeuce
    21:38 | Aired on 05/03/2013
    When Penny's mom and Dave's dad decide to adopt a baby together, Dave and Penny react irrationally; Brad and Jane join an exclusive tennis club in hope of gaining time some time to themselves.
  • Un-sabotagable
    21:21 | Aired on 04/19/2013
    Max asks Jane to help him get his act together so he can prove that his life is not pathetic; Alex tries to use a stockpile of coupons.
  • The Ballad of Lon Sarofsky
    21:36 | Aired on 04/19/2013
    Penny's friends are shocked when she has an affair with the Car Czar (Rob Corddry); Max enters a pageant with Dave and Alex as his coaches.