The Ryan Report -- Episode 309 "Close Encounters of the Murderous Kind"

Ryan's Bio | Read the episode recap

I like to think of myself as an open guy – open to new ideas, to different points of view, to intriguing possibilities. It’s one of the many reasons why Castle and I get along so well. We both like to keep an open mind about the million possible outcomes available out in the wide world. When he spins one of his elaborate theories, Beckett will roll her eyes, Espo will shake his head, but I’m right there with him. I mean, who can say? Maybe this time mole men did tunnel up and begin their world takeover attempt by assassinating an ice cream man. For every crazy idea of Castle’s, there’s an even stranger actual reason behind a homicide I investigate.

So I was on board when we started looking into a recent murder that seemed to be somewhat... extra-terrestrial in nature. See, my family has had some history with beings from another world. A few years back, my second cousin Raymond was heading home from a party in New Jersey. According to Raymond, it was one of those eerily bright nights where the moon hangs high in the sky and the world has strange cold stillness to it. Raymond was heading back home to Queens when suddenly bright lights descended towards him from the sky, right through his windshield. Raymond said it was as if the moon itself had tumbled down onto his car. Then everything went black. The next thing Raymond knew, it was the next morning and he was waking up on the side of the Jersey turnpike…

Of course, when my father heard this story, he pointed out that Raymond had woken up on the side of the road more than few times and none of those times had anything do with aliens. It’s true, Raymond was always the lightweight in our family. But still, there was something about that story that stuck out to me. A certain electricity to the way Raymond told his tale, a passion to the way he would talk about it to anyone who would listen.. And, anyhow, after all the crazy things that Raymond has done and then denied doing, it seems really odd that he’d stake his already tattered reputation on this one.

At the end of the day, is it really so impossible that aliens would take an interest in coming down to our planet? We’re pretty fascinating creatures and I don’t ever tire of finding out the latest amazing thing that someone’s gotten up to – whether it’s trying to walk from South America to England or make a montage of every Arnold Schwarzenegger scream ever. It’s one of the things that make my job so endlessly fascinating. Even asking for alibis can turn into a rabbit hole of amazing things that you had no idea humans spent their time doing. All I can say is that there are more exotic obsessions out there than you can dream of!

All of this is simply to say that if there’s one thing I’ve learned from this job it’s to keep an open mind, because anything and everything is possible. So when Raymond talks about being abducted by aliens this Thanksgiving, and after his third drink he most definitely will, I’ll be there to listen to him even when my mom rolls her eyes and my dad shakes his head. It’ll be just like back at the Precinct!